No matter how it happens, breakups often leave one or both people feeling pretty down. One of the toughest ways a relationship can end is when your partner doesn’t really have an explanation—they just lose interest. Sometimes it’s not your fault; it’s just how time passes or how people change. Other times, it might be something you did, like distancing yourself or unintentionally hurting the other person. But unless they give you a reason, it’s important not to overreact if your partner loses interest.

“Regardless of the reason, what’s important is that the person ‘left behind’ because their partner lost interest does not try and change themselves as a result,” relationship coach and founder of Maze of Love, Chris Armstrong, tells Bustle. “If parts of you drew your partner away, maybe it’s time to look within, but don’t make sudden changes over one person losing interest.” If you notice a pattern of people you’re dating losing interest, it might be time to reflect inwardly. Remember, there are many reasons why this can happen.

1. It Was Lust, Not Love, After All

Sometimes, people warn you not to rush into anything because intense feelings can wear off quickly. If they lose interest, it might be because the initial lust fades, revealing there was no strong foundation. “The initial excitement and energy that their partner brought no longer exists. It can be common for people to put their best foot forward upfront, only to fall back to their natural self as the relationship progresses,” Armstrong says.

2. They Can’t Get Over Something

If you’ve hurt someone, they might not be able to get over it, no matter how much they try. Even if it seems like water under the bridge, they could internalize it and grow distant until they completely shut down to you or the relationship.

3. They’ve Just Changed

Sometimes, it’s simple—they’ve just changed. We all evolve, and sometimes these changes are significant enough that they are no longer interested in the same things or people. “The person that loses interest has changed or has discovered some things about themselves,” Armstrong says. “It can be common for two people to start dating and break up for seemingly no reason. They didn’t fight a lot, and communication was good, but someone evolved and realized they wanted different things in a partner.”

4. Something Else Is Taking Priority

Not everyone prioritizes their relationship. If their job, hobbies, or other passions take over, their relationship will hold less interest for them. Whether it’s a big passion or just a scattered focus, it can be tough to deal with.

5. They Meet Someone Else

Especially in the early stages of a relationship, they might meet someone else. It’s a gut-wrenching feeling, but at least you have a definite “why.”

6. Commitment-Phobia Sets In

Not everyone is great at settling down. They might get caught up in the excitement of a new relationship but then become restless. Do they really want to be with just one person? Commitment-phobes are often looking for greener grass, making it easy for them to lose interest in what’s right in front of them.

7. You’ve Changed

Maybe you’ve grown into a new, happier person, but that doesn’t necessarily mean your partner will be happy with the new you. That’s okay. When their interest wanes, don’t be afraid to find someone who’s interested in the new you—they’re out there.